I took a good look at myself the other day- and decided I needed to come up with a good way to deal with aging. That old adage- you’re only as old as you feel, is a bunch of crap. I think you are only as old as you act and/or look. It doesn’t matter how you feel. If it did, I would be 500 years old.
Of course, you do have to limit your moaning and groaning as you move about the house, get out of bed, or a haul your ass out of a comfortable chair, but that is a learned skill.
I thought to myself- you can do this Katie. You can age gracefully and maybe even embrace it a little- on a good day, well sometimes, maybe.
Aging is a gradual process that hits us all at once. It’s the damndest thing. And, it’s not like I fell apart all at once either. I started wearing glasses in my 40’s, hearing aids in my early 50’s and I’ve bleached my graying hair forever. This year I have noticed a few new things, like thinning skin that bleeds at the tiniest scratch, multiple age spots, weight gain that won’t come off no matter what diet I’m on, wrinkles on my face, saggy upper arms, saggy everything actually, and facial hair I never had before. My upper body strength is not what it once was- and the veins, the veins in my legs are hideous- good thing I can’t see them unless I use a magnifying glass.
The facial hair is a big problem, because my eyes are bad. I have to remove the errant hairs by Braille. I keep meaning to ask my son to make sure he plucks my chin and brows when I’m too old to do it myself. I don’t ever want to be one of those old ladies that walks around with a chin hair two inches long and doesn’t realize everyone stares at her chin hair when talking to her. It’s worse than a guy with a bad rug.
That my ass and my boobs are still north of my knees is a small blessing for which I am thankful. My super-duper bras cost a fortune though- and nothing will be coming from Victoria’s secret.
Besides all the body changes, there are personality issues too. I am going to be 60 years old in just a couple of months, and I have an attitude to match it. I’m almost 60 for Christ’s sake- don’t talk to me like I'm 12. I don’t care who you are.
Granted, I kind of always had that attitude even when I was 12- but now I have something to back it up.
A lot of people in my age group are going under the knife for a little plastic youth. That’s probably not going to be my route. Too many of them come out looking like burn victims, and while maybe they prefer that to wrinkles, I am positive I would not. If you do it- please take before and after pictures and send them to me so I can post them on my blog. Maybe you’ll change my mind.
If anything can get us through this aging process, it will be sense of humor. Even stuff that is not so funny can be funny if you look at it with the right perspective. So, my new perspective is this: I’m glad I’m not dead yet. Everything from there looks good to me.
